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“Does it bring you joy?” is a better question than you may think. Especially for us guys.

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photo by Thomas Young on unsplash(dot)com… Thanks, Thomas!

Don’t be tempted to skip this one…

We don’t use that word a lot, especially us guys. You know the word… the “J” word. Okay, I’ll say it dammit… j-o-y—JOY. Happy now?

Now, I’ll even use it in a sentence—“Hey, did you catch the game, wasn’t it a joy to watch?” 

You won’t hear it. You just won’t hear it.

That’s what I thought anyway. Ever since I wrote down my initial thoughts for this post a few days ago, I’m hearing it everywhere now. But, if not the word, doesn’t the question, “Does it bring you joy?” sound a bit strange?

I’m sure it’s a cultural thing… joy doesn’t happen to be part of my lingo and I don’t think I’m alone.

Whatever the case, something weird happened to me last week… nothing all that special. Just one of those rare flashes of brilliant clarity. BOOM!

Many of us have figured out that downsizing is a good thing, right?

You get an instant feeling that some weight has been lifted even when you give away even one little thing. 

But have you noticed how hard it is to let go of some of your possessions?  What’s it called when you see more value in an item simply because you own it? * Because it’s your precious little thing?

Which brings us to my life-changing moment…

I have this long sleeve thermal knit tee shirt that I bought from Banana Republic longer ago than I can pinpoint. It was years ago. And I’m certain it was on sale (which means it should be even less valuable to me).  It’s an okay piece that’s good for layering in the cooler months… so I always thought.

This particular morning I was folding a load of tees from the laundry. I do not know where that question came from… I’m not a member of the Marie Kondo club. Nonetheless, the question popped into my head as I was folding this particular shirt. 

“Does… this… bring… me… joy?”

The answer came as effortlessly as the question…

Hell no! it doesn’t bring me joy. It annoys the crap out of me every time I wear it.”

—Me

The cuffs always stretch out within minutes. No, seconds. Then it’s a constant battle of trying not to notice or continuous “juzhing” (I-have-no-idea-how-that-word-is-spelled). **

No matter what, I can count on being annoyed while wearing that shirt. 

Into the donation box it went. What the KonMari have I been waiting for?

If you’re not into the whole “joy” thing I completely get it. I’m not so much either. You can come up with your own question if you want. But I’m telling you, I can’t think of another way of inducing such clarity.

Repeat after me…

“Hell no! It doesn’t bring me joy.”

It may be the quirkiness or outright dorkiness of the question that actually makes it work. You tell me? But you sure won’t be hanging onto those things that don’t bring you joy.

There. I said it.

Be Untucked.

Epilogue

I have not read the book, but many swear by Marie’s methods. I think I’ll start by MarieKondoing my garage next weekend… I would not get too close.

* I had to know… it’s called the “Endowment Effect.” Thank you, Wikipedia!

** In general use, ‘zhuzh‘ tends to mean “to improve in appearance by way of a slight adjustment.” Turns out I was close with the spelling. I found another version, too… ‘tszuj.’ Who knew?

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Copyright © 2019 Jeff Meister

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Filed Under: LifeUntucked Tagged With: clarity, letting go, questions

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Welcome!

Hi! I’m Jeff, the curious and steadfastly optimistic observer, interpreter, scavenger, wanderer, dabbler, and wordsmith behind LifeUntucked®. I’m glad you stopped by.

I write stories, essays, musings, how-tos, and more on how to navigate a noisy, mixed-up world.

It's crazy out there! I know, do you think?

I believe all the noise has caused us to veer off course on life’s true journey. What do I mean by 'true journey'? Well, that's for you to decide, my friend.

I’m on a mission to course-correct and get beyond the noise! I'd love to have you join me! You in?

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