Could you use a few go-to holiday coping strategies that are simple and actually work? I know I can—I just hit the panic button for about the fifth time and this is a relatively quiet holiday season for us so far this year.
These tips are for anyone who loves the holidays but still feels the pressures and frustrations that come with the season.
Okay, let’s dive in—
1. Mix Things Up to Keep Things New.
During the thick of the pandemic, I proposed that “mixing things up” was the best holiday coping strategy. Since the idea seemed to resonate, I’m keeping it at the top of the list. (You can read the post here.)
According to UrbanDictionary.com, to mix it up means, “to do something fun, entertaining, or exciting.” Or “to add a difference to anything you’re doing.” Fairly straightforward, right?
Since then, we’ve found ways to work around any lingerings-on of the pandemic while staying safe. Even with all that no longer at the center of our thoughts, I’m thinking most would agree that we could still use some simple, reliable holiday coping strategies to see us through the season.
So here are four more…
2. Discover New Ways to Celebrate and Start New Traditions.
Getting back to normal doesn’t preclude adding new experiences. If what you used to do isn’t working out or you can’t make it happen this year, then start a new tradition.
In a post I read on caregiver.com, Helen Hunter, ACSW, LSW recommends that we “Start traditions that make the most sense to you in your life now. It doesn’t always have to be done the same way every year.” This is where a lot of family tussles begin—so beware!
Lanette and I are learning this one after our move to New Mexico. Santa Fe really leans into celebrating the holidays. There’s something “holiday” for everyone nearly every day of the holiday season.
So, that’s helping us get out and truly experience the holidays again. With multiple cultures in one city, we can’t help but make new discoveries as long as we don’t wimp out because it’s too cold out there.
3. Listening to “Understand” Is Safer Ground
Sometimes holiday gatherings, especially some family holiday gatherings, seem to have, let’s say, their explosive moments. I thought of this as I read Greg McKeown’s “1-Minute Wednesday” this week. The title was “Stop Thinking You Have to Agree or Disagree.”
Think about this for a moment… almost everyone, most of the time, listens with the intent to agree or disagree. That’s probably you and me too.
Greg asks, “What if, instead of trying to win the conversation, we could create a space between agreeing and disagreeing?” One where we try to listen and understand what the other person is trying to say. A novel idea for the times, right?
Maybe crazy Uncle Bill isn’t so crazy after all. Maybe he just wants to be heard and understood along with the rest of us who’ve gotten into the habit of keeping score rather than having an interesting grown-up conversation.
Be sure to check out Greg’s post here.
4. Lower the “Expectations” Bar for Better Outcomes.
One of the main causes for holiday upset is the human tendency to expect certain events to turn out a particular way. You can never force these things and expect them to come off without a hitch.
Get in the habit of giving yourself and everyone else enough grace to let your special events turn out however they will.
And let some things go unfinished. I haven’t forgotten my neighbor Glenn’s wisdom back when we were preparing for the big move to New Mexico, “You won’t be ready, and you won’t get everything done in time. Let yourself accept that going in.” That’s sage wisdom for this time of year, too, don’t you think?
Oh, and let go of things at the office. You know the boss is home with her family. And if she isn’t, well… that’s her life to mess up.
5. Seek Out Relaxing Surroundings for Peaceful Timeouts
Our environment has a powerful effect on our mood. Remember to turn on some music, light some candles, or make your escape by taking a walk.
Seriously, even stepping away from all the hustle and bustle for a few minutes can help you take a timeout to hit the reset button. That’s why in movies we see people stepping outside of office parties so much. Fresh air does wonders for your holiday spirit.
The biggest thing to realize is that you’re going to feel overwhelmed at least once between mid-November and the end of the year. Probably closer to a hundred or more times. So, go easy on yourself. Check your holiday mindset every day.
Postpone your frustrations by showing understanding and calm and allow the holiday season to be a time to have fun and share time together. Remember not to wait until it’s all over to sit down, relax, and count your blessings.
Then, let yourself start looking forward to next year because you’ll get to do it all over again!
Be untucked.
p.s. And if you struggled with buying all those gifts this year, check out my post on gift-giving strategies that really work so you won’t be in the same bind next year.
p.s. Thanks for dropping by LifeUntucked®. If you found this post helpful be sure to share it with a friend. I owe you one…
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